


wash it off

by leafvillagebitch



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Pre-Relationship, Pre-Series, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-14
Updated: 2018-04-14
Packaged: 2019-04-22 13:43:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14309922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leafvillagebitch/pseuds/leafvillagebitch
Summary: Kakashi has the nightmare at Iruka's house.





	wash it off

**Author's Note:**

> Hiya! This is.... this is sad i don't really know what else to say about it ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> As always, none of my fic is posted in order and it all exists in the same canon-compliant universe ❤️

Iruka waking up in the middle of the night to Kakashi not being in his bed wasn’t a new occurrence. The sound of water running was.

“Kakashi?”

He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, and when he didn’t get an answer, he rolled out of bed and walked to the kitchen to find Kakashi scrubbing at his hands and arms.

“Kakashi, what’s going on?” he mumbled, voice still heavy with sleep.

Kakashi looked up, eyes wide – Iruka wasn’t sure Kakashi had even heard him, and he went back to scrubbing.

“It won’t come off!”

“What won’t come off?”

“The- the blood it won’t- it won’t come off me”

“Hey, whoa. Kakashi. You’re okay; you’re okay.”

Iruka walked carefully towards him, his hands up and his palms open. He slowly reached for the faucet, turned the sink off, and gently grabbed Kakashi’s shoulders.

Kakashi stood there, staring at the sink. Iruka took a deep breath and held Kakashi tight in his arms.

“You’re safe. You’re here. I’m here. I’m with you.”

Kakashi took a deep breath into Iruka’s shoulder before giving into sobs that tore through him. He cried and cried and cried; Iruka stood there, holding him.

“It’s all over me; I can’t-”

“Come on, let’s wash it off.”

Iruka took him by the hand and led him to the shower. He undressed Kakashi, who was too in shock to fight. He turned on the hot water, put some soap on the sponge, and started scrubbing at Kakashi’s body. Kakashi cried, and Iruka scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed. When the hot water had run out, they got out of the shower; Iruka tossed him some sweatpants and the shirt he had come in with. Kakashi pulled the shirt over his head, and Iruka stepped closer and pulled the mask up over his face.

“Better?”

Kakashi nodded. He looked young, Iruka thought. It had been a year and half since he first invited Kakashi in, and this was the only time Iruka had seen him show any real emotion. He knew Kakashi didn’t owe him that; they weren’t anything official. Lovers, almost. Sometimes. It was still nice to know he trusted him enough to be vulnerable. Or maybe this was an involuntary reaction to whatever had happened and Iruka just happened to be there.

Iruka took him back to bed, leaned against the headboard and pulled Kakashi into him, his cheek against Iruka’s chest, their legs intertwined.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Kakashi shook his head; Iruka ran his fingers through Kakashi’s hair, remembering how his mom would do this when he was a child. They sat in silence this way for several minutes; he felt Kakashi’s breathing start to slow along with his heartbeat.

“I, uh, I have this nightmare. And it doesn’t happen very often anymore, not as much as when I was young.” He spoke quickly, like if he didn’t get the words out now, he never would.

“Some nights it’s worse than others; the longer I go without having it, the worse it gets. I think…. I think maybe I don’t normally let myself fall asleep deeply enough to have it. The worst nights are when I wake up and it feels like I’m still in the dream – there’s blood everywhere, and it won’t wash off.”

“Oh, Kakashi. I wish… I wish there was some way I could help. You don’t deserve that.”

“They call me Kakashi the Friend-Killer, you know.” His voice was soft, and something in his tone made it clear that he believed it.

“And we both know that’s not fair.”

Kakashi pulled himself out of Iruka’s arms and ran his fingers along Iruka’s cheek, almost tenderly, and made sure Iruka held his gaze.

“I think you have a hard time reconciling the ANBU operative and the man who shares your bed.”

Iruka sighed, knowing the conversation was over.

“Do you want to go back to sleep, Kakashi?”

“I won’t fall back asleep, but I’ll stay, if you want me to.”

“Will you sleep if you go home?”

“Probably not.”

“It’s probably easier for you to stay then.”

They laid back down, Iruka turned away from Kakashi, and Kakashi wrapped his arm around Iruka’s chest. Iruka waited for a moment before placing his hand on top of Kakashi’s.

“You’re a good man, Iruka. You deserve to be with someone who can treat you like one.”

Iruka hummed, clearly only half-awake. He started to snore and Kakashi buried his face in Iruka’s back, breathing him in.

“I wish I could be that man for you.”

Iruka woke up to an empty bed.

 

 

 

 


End file.
